just a little broken

Why do "it's over" hurt so much? Have any of you ever sat and thought that one through? I mean, do they hurt, everyone knows that much, but has anyone ever asked why?

Because for something that's caused as much anguish as it has, and affected as many people as it has. They hurt like death hurts and  the reason we cry, and rant, and feel so goddamn sorry for ourselves, is the same reason we feel that same such agony when we lose someone: Memories.

Sadly, losing someone will always hurt and it's the memories that hurt the most, at least think of it in a way that you got the chance to experience those moments with that person even though its memories you miss, it's memories you can look back to. That all the memories we have are all the memories we will ever have and that the last time you saw that person, the last time you hugged them, you kissed them, the last time you said you loved them. those are the last times you'll ever have. And you think to yourself of all the things you'd have done differently, and you think of what you'd give to have just one more day with that person. Just one more chance, realize that we will never again get a chance to make new memories with this person.

You always think you'll have tomorrow, to make it all up, to do the right thing, but the truth is that you just never know how much time you've got. So do yourselves a favor and take the only time that is guaranteed to you, right now, and make more memories, make every moment worth while.

Hell, memories is what I think complicates things, yeah, memories are what make it seem to last forever, and when something ends, we can't help but replay things back. You know, like a movie in our heads.

My consolation during these times is that everything happens for a reason and even if its hard to swallow at this time. Truth is. It really does. If it was meant to be it will be, who knows maybe later down the line you will find each other. Or maybe it is not destined for you to be together and there's someone else waiting for you that will be the one you have been looking for all your life and came this far for. Who's to say. All I know when I went through my losing I thought my sun would never rise again. Although, even when we were together my world was dark to begin with. Since I've known him I can't really say that I remember that dark world, sometimes I wonder if there ever was a dark place to begin with, it's been that long since I left that dark place behind me and although at that time I never dreamt of being in the place I am right now. Now I can't ever imagine being in that place I was before. Don't worry, your sun will rise soon, it never fails to.

Well, here's a bit of enlightenment from me to you: Love sure does have a way of breaking you down emotionally, doesn't it? Get through the suffering! Sometimes, I wish I were more superficial. On an emotional level, I mean. I think the idea of not feeling the hurt which I'm feeling, or even maybe just feeling it a little bit less, is just too attractive a concept not to want right now. But then I realize that it's because I am the way that I am, that I've been able to love the way that I have. And even though, right now, it's a curse to feel as deeply as I feel, I know that when things are just right. There's no greater blessing.

♥